we decided to go for a little trip. wonderful break and will be going back soon for sure. already miss our apartment :(
I've been thinking a lot about life recently, and I've realised that the majority of bad decisions I've made have come from a lack of trust and confidence in myself and my emotions, with too much focus on the perceptions of others rather than being honest with myself. Throughout our lives, and as we grow, the focus on us and what makes us happy becomes less important. Society teaches us to value other people's opinion more than our own and people end up caring more about how they will be perceived for feeling a certain way rather than being true to themselves and being honest with themselves about what it is that they want. Of course, it can go the other way- selfishness is a vice we all partake in at times and to think of ones happiness over others isn't necessarily a good thing. I personally feel that putting others before yourself is always a positive way to live life, but not if by doing this you put yourself in situations that you don't want to be in. That's where the problem lies. When people don't trust themselves and aren't honest about how they feel, I feel that ultimately it can only lead to unhappiness. If you feel something for someone, allow yourself to feel that way. And if you don't, be honest about it because lying to protect another's feelings will only be detrimental in the end. Rip the band aid, per sé and just be true to yourself. In essence, all of this is a kind of miscommunication and suppression of ones emotions., I feel like there are so many people who are missing out on true happiness because they feel as though the pressure to conform to society is stronger than their desire to pursue their own happiness. People who equate fitting in and conforming with happiness are being dishonest with themselves and, well- honesty is the best policy (cheese!) Anyway. I guess after having thought about this stuff recently I just wanted to put it out there for anyone else stuck in a battle between what they "should" feel and how they actually do. Don't waste your time worrying about fitting in, remember that when it comes down to it, we are in charge of creating our own happiness. Neela x So a couple of days ago, I lost someone close to me. Never before have I ever been close to even being able to imagine what it feels like to lose someone you love. It is unbearable. I still can't believe that someone I love has been taken from me, and the fact that there's nothing I can do about it. Joe was one of the smartest, most amazing people I have ever met. And I know everyone says that, but this is really true. Joe understood the world, he understood and admired the universe in a way that made him so special. He saw things differently, he saw people as they are and understood human nature on such a deep level, I'm left in awe of his uniqueness. Joe studied physics, he was interested in how the world worked and the essence of human nature. I know Joe was fascinated by buddhism, and strongly believed that in order to connect with the universe we have to truly accept all of the pain and hardship that comes with life, to achieve both global and inner peace. Today I watched this video, and not only was it visually beautiful, but I know it's something he would have liked. I post this for all the people who look up at the stars and wonder, because I know that's what he did. I think now, that he's somewhere up there- a part of the amazing universe he was so fascinated by. Everyone has different interpretations, but i like to think he's up there looking at that amazing view I know he would have loved. It hurts every single day you not being here. I still don't want to accept you've gone. But I know that you'll always be with me as long as you are in my heart, and I will never forget you and the lessons you have taught me during your life, and after you left this earth. This first video is for you. Your views on life will absolutely change the world, just as you have changed my world simply by being in it. I love you, and I miss you. Joseph Elliot Goode, 3rd July 1992 - 4th December 2013. |